Friday, February 25, 2005

Navel gazing

I hope my visits to the same bikini bar aren’t sounding too repetitive, but it’s the most convenient place for me to live out that part of my secret life. It’s a routine that’s relatively safe and discreet and allows my fantasy cache to refill every now and then. When circumstances allow, I plan to branch out to other venues and I will share my experiences.

There are other aspects of my secret self besides strip club mongering that I could confess here. For a while I was a voyeur photographer and I keep my collection pretty much to myself. When I figure out how to use the image software on this site, I will post some pictures. And of course there are always fantasies to write about, but I have the feeling that men’s fantasies can be really boring to others. And as someone who works in a profession with a code of ethics, I feel that I have to employ some self-censorship when fantasies involve some of the people I see in real life.

The one good thing about going to strip clubs (and I may have said this before) is that it satisfies my need for extracurricular sex without all the emotional baggage that an affair can bring. Been there, done that. It would be nice to find a fuck buddy, friend with benefits, but that seems uncomfortably close to carrying on an affair. Besides, with my schedule, spur of the moment visits to a club when I can is much easier than juggling rendezvous times with another person. Maybe things will change – secret real sex with a real woman would certainly be a lot nicer than dry humping in the back corner of a club.

At any rate, let this self-reflection serve as a place-holder until I write up my most recent bikini bar visit.

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Wednesday, February 16, 2005

An old favorite

One Sunday I announced I was going downtown to spend a Borders gift certificate. The busses were on a holiday schedule so I had an excuse to pad my trip by an hour or so. I slipped into my bikini bar around 2pm and it seemed like a normal crowd for a weekend afternoon. There were several dancers milling around, some sitting with their 'regulars.'

The first couple of dancers on stage weren't too exciting. I caught the end of L's set - she's a little on the heavy side but was very friendly as she stuck her tits in my face and rubbed them all over my head. My hard-on told me to ask her for a dance but when she got off stage she went right back to her guy, a big thug. I wasn't about to interrupt them to ask. P took the stage next - a dark-haired, nicely shaped woman who spread her legs in front of me and stroked her pussy with her middle finger and turned over and slapped her ass real hard. She was standoff-ish with me, but was all over a couple of the other men at the stage. Maybe she doesn't trust men she doesn't know.

I sat back at a table away from the stage and waited to see who was next. A dirty blonde dancer came to sit with me. She was very thin and looked like a crack addict. Her name was S and she had just started working there. I was afraid she would ask if I wanted a private dance because she was kind of scary. I needed an excuse to get away from her and it came in the form of one of my old favorites - C took the stage next. Before she left, P joined C in attending to a fat guy sitting at the stage, rubbing 4 tits all over him and running their hands over his mounds of flesh. "Must be a regular" I said to S who indicated he was. As I looked at her I saw a guy with greasy black hair and leather jacket come over to stand behind S. He looked just as strung out and was acting more like a boyfriend than a regular so I took my cue to excuse myself to go to the stage.

C said she remembered me, but I'm always skeptical of the lines dancers hand me. She was her friendly self as she giggled that it was her birthday a few days ago and she's been drunk ever since. She's tall with long, frizzed-out strawberry blonde hair and she was wearing her usual costume - stockings and a black lace teddy with a very short black skirt. It's a bikini bar so the important parts must stay covered, but that's never been a problem for dancers here. C pulled out her tits and rubbed them in my face and spread her legs so I could rut around under her skirt. I asked if she had a lot of men waiting for a private dance and was surprised to hear that she was available after her set.

She took me up into the private dance area. There were a couple other couples in there and C guided me to a corner. She sat next to me and we cuddled a little bit before she lay on her stomach across my lap with her tits conveniently over my left hand and her pelvis over my right. I discreetly ran my hand up her leg to that little valley where thigh meets pussy lips and tentatively stroked her pussy through the black lace. She didn't seem to mind (I never know how far to go with dancers so I politely test their limits.)

She got up to do the dance for real. She started by straddling me and began a slow back and forth rhythm with her crotch running up and down my hardening cock. Unlike a lot of dancers who change their positions often, C kept this up for a while. She kept a poutty, concentrating-on-sex look on her face and leaned in every now and then to breathe down my neck and moan a little in my ear. I loved to nuzzle behind her ear and take in her scent. She also pulled out her tits (usually the one not visible from the door) and offered them to me to fondle and squeeze. She looked over her shoulder every now and then to make sure we wouldn't get busted (so to speak).

By now I was rock hard and I kept thrusting my hips to match her rhythm and hoping I was giving her some pleasure too. In another test, I ran my hands down over her mound and found that the material around her crotch was pulled to one side and half of her pussy was showing. I ran my finger under the lace between thrusts and stroked her clit a little. I seemed to be a little swollen and I like to think it was from the friction on my cock. I guessed I reached her limit and she switched positions. She got on her knees and started to simulate a titty fuck. The pressure and steady movement was bringing me to the bursting point.

She glanced at the door again and brought her arms up so her hands were up at my belt level. She discreetly brought one hand lower and her fingers started to fiddle with the tip of my cock which by then was at my belt level too. A minute or two of that and that was it. I came as she continued to tweak me. Her fiddling became a little painful after I shot my load and I said I was all set.

I don't think she realized I had come at first because she seemed disappointed that I had her stop. As we stood up she hugged me and ran her knees up to my crotch and turned around to rub her butt against my spent unit. I explained what happened and she was back to her friendly self. I paid her and she wanted to sit with me for a while. I really wanted to, but I still had to go to the bookstore (y excuse) and get home before suspicions arose. I will have to make it up to her next time I see her, and I'll also see how much farther I can push her limits.

I rushed to the store, bought some stuff and made it home without incident.

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